Amanda King Stetson
Amanda had to admit that Francine had done a good job with the Middle East transcripts; not only were the analyses complete, but they were also filed and cross-referenced against earlier ones. At least they had been in the computer system. She couldn’t say the same about the paper files, but then again, very few agents were good about their paper files. The ladies in the steno pool called it “job security.” She called it annoying. Would it kill someone to spend an hour every week keeping their paperwork straight?
Ordinarily, she considered it a minor issue, but the files had piled up alarmingly during her three-week absence. It did seem, though, that someone had been at least attempting to work on it, given that she wasn’t finding anything more recent than a week ago —
The sound of the Q-Bureau’s door brought her out of her musing. To her surprise, it wasn’t Lee who stepped through, but Francine.
The other woman seemed equally startled. “Oh. Amanda. I didn’t know you were back at work yet.”
“Well,” said Amanda, “now you do.”
Francine’s eyebrows went up. “How are you?”
“I’m all right. Ready to come back.”
“I see,” she answered. “And, ah, it’s good to have you back. We missed you and…well, it just seemed like…” she trailed off awkwardly.
“It seemed like what? I’m so emotional that I was going to need more time off? Three weeks is more than the standard, Francine, and from the looks of the filing, there’d have been a big problem if I had taken any more than that. But I’m not everyone’s secretary, so I’m not going to catch anyone else’s filing up except my own.” It was only after the words came out that she realized how shrewish her tone had become.
“Nobody expects you to.” Francine indicated the pile. “I came in to work on those. Shouldn’t be more than a couple hours. Are you…you’re all right if I take everything into the vault? You’re not using anything, are you?”
“No,” answered Amanda, “go right ahead.”
She crossed over and picked up the folders. “Oh, yeah, one other thing. Congratulations.”
“For what?” Surely she couldn’t be talking about Phillip and Mother!
“You and Lee. We, ah, it was pretty obvious that any breakup you’d had was temporary, but no one thought…” she trailed off again. “He never seemed to be the marrying kind, but you managed to do it.”
Irritation lanced through her. “Do what?”
“Get him to marry you. Oh, this is coming out all wrong. I’m happy it happened, for both of you I mean. Even if you did lie to all of us about it.”
“Francine,” she snapped, “you know full well why we kept it a secret. You were part of the investigation when Tran Van Khai’s children were kidnapped, and that wasn’t the first time we’ve seen someone go after family members! Can you really blame us for trying to keep mine safe? I mean, even though we did, look what happened!”
Surprise flickered across the other woman’s face. “I thought it was an accident.”
“I…” now Amanda trailed off. “All right, we don’t have any evidence that says it isn’t. Still, doesn’t it seem likely that someone would’ve been trying to come after me or Lee or maybe even both of us?”
“Maybe,” said Francine, her tone still wary. “But if it is, it’ll come out. I just wanted to say congratulations. It’s been good to see you both so happy, and now that we know why…well, maybe when the time’s right, we’ll all go out and celebrate. We’re agents, after all. We can keep the reason for the party secret.”
“Why would you want to? We’re not hiding it now.” She shook her head. “But a party’s the last thing either one of us is interested in at the moment.” Or maybe ever, she thought but didn’t say. How could they do something like that after —
“Amanda,” said Francine in a gentler tone. “We’re not talking about doing it anytime soon. Just someday.”
She swallowed. “Thank you. I appreciate that. I just — I’m sorry, Francine, I just seem to be prickly today.”
“Nobody blames you for that. But I should warn you, you’re going to get a lot of comments about your ring. It’s very nice. Lee did a good job.”
“It was his mother’s,” explained Amanda. “He had it reset before he gave it to me. But he’d used it once before that, when we went down to San Angelo, since he hadn’t been able to get one from Fabrications or Storage.”
Francine chuckled. “How very ironic. The same ring was used at both of your weddings.”
“We only had one, Francine,” she replied stiffly.
“Did you? Or maybe it was already on Lee’s mind during the —”
“We weren’t seeing each other then. Not even casually.”
“Oh, come on, Amanda, you two were obvious within months of you starting! We all knew what was going on when Lee started crawling down people’s throats if they so much as talked about asking you to lunch! And you — well, he’s never let anyone straighten his tie like that, or hold his hand, or —” she broke off. “There were a million things you two were doing, and everyone noticed. It was actually pretty funny.”
“Funny?”
“Yes. Lee had never met a woman he couldn’t sweet-talk around to his way before, and he didn’t have a clue what to do about it. Let me tell you, some of the other ladies and I had quite a laugh every time you put him in his place.” She shook her head. “I hope he doesn’t forget that, now that you’re married.”
“Why would he?”
“Just that everything’s different now.”
“It’s been this way for months already, and you know what, Francine? Another reason we wanted to keep all of this out of the office was because it’s nobody’s business but our own, to begin with. If there’s a problem with our case work or efficiency ratings, then take it to Mr. Melrose, but until then I’ll thank everyone to keep their opinions to themselves!” She shook her head. “I shouldn’t even have to ask for that, but this has to be the worst place I’ve ever seen for gossip.”
“Oh, come on, Amanda, you’ve dished just as often as everyone else. And we’ve all seen you around the bullpen, trying to figure out what’s going on when Lee’s been on confidential assignment. It’s normal for people to talk. You’ve got no business objecting now, just because you’re a part of the rumor mill this time around. It’s not like it’s the first time, either, and you know it.”
“Well, it needs to be the last,” she snapped. “I’m not here to entertain anyone or live up to anyone else’s standards! And when you understand what it’s like to have half your life ripped away from you in an instant, then you —” she broke off, gasping, her hands clenching so hard they crumpled the folders she’d been holding.
“As if you’re the only person who’s ever been through a horrible loss!” shouted Francine. “You’re not the only one who’s ever had something like this happen —”
“Something like what?”
Neither one of them had heard Billy Melrose come in the door.
“Ladies?”
Francine took a sharp breath, her expression becoming neutral. “Nothing. We were just talking.”
His gaze slid over to Amanda, who shook her head. “Francine just came in to catch up on some filing.”
“I see,” he said, although his tone said a lot more. “Well, Desmond, go ahead and get to it, and close the vault door behind you, please. Amanda, we need to talk. Do you want to do it here, or in my office?”
She squared her shoulders. “I’m fine right here, sir, unless it’s sensitive.”
“It’s not a security issue, if that’s what you mean,” he answered, “but it could be sensitive. I just want to make sure you’re ready to be back at work.”
“Is there some reason you think I’m not?”
“Despite what Ms. Tactful-and-Compassionate in there was trying to say, you’ve been through an enormous loss. People have taken more time off for less.” He paused. “You’re welcome to wait until you’re ready, Amanda, but when you do come back, I’ll need you at full strength.”
“I’m fine, sir. Getting myself back into a routine is good for me, and I’m already back at full strength.”
“Are you?” he asked. “Because you don’t usually let Francine get to you like that, and I’ve seen a lot worse than I did just now.”
“I just wasn’t expecting it,” she explained. “That’s all.”
“Amanda,” he said, and he crossed his arms while leaning back. “Let me be clearer. I really think you should take at least another week, at least, so that you’re ready to handle the job and the personalities again.”
She could feel her skin heating up. “I can do my job!” Then she paused. “Unless I’m not, of course, but sir, I haven’t been back long enough to have any performance! I told you. The routine is healthy, and if these files are any indication, it’s not like the bad guys out there took any time off! That means I can’t, either. I appreciate how you’ve been covering for me on the Middle East transcripts and not assigning any new cases to Lee and me, but that can’t last forever and I need…” her voice broke suddenly, without any warning, and she caught her breath.
“Need what?” Mr. Melrose’s voice was gentle, his eyes kind.
Amanda shook herself off. “Sir, I understand what you’re trying to do, but I don’t need to be coddled or babied. I’m a full agent now, and I should be held to the same standards as everyone else.”
He perused her before nodding. “All right. But Amanda, even Lee took four weeks after Eric Devereux was gunned down. There’s no shame in asking for more time.”
“Thank you,” she replied, glad to hear that her voice had evened out. “But I’m fine, sir. I really am.”
“Okay, then. Just be aware that I’m going to hold you to that.”
Jamie squirmed as he shifted his shirt around, causing the hat to fall off his head. When he bent down to retrieve it, his cane clattered to the ground. “Darn it. Again.”
Sighing, Amanda bent over to pick it up and hand it back. “You look fine. Maybe if you quit pulling on your shirt, you wouldn’t have so much trouble with the hat and cane.”
“Maybe if I had a Where’s Waldo costume that fit, I wouldn’t have any trouble at all.”
She frowned. “If you’re not having fun, sweetheart, we can go back to the apartment.”
At that, he straightened. The candy bag banged against his leg. “No, Mom. I’m fine. Come on, we’re only halfway through the street and I haven’t yet met up with Andy Kaskill. He’s going to be so jealous that we found a striped shirt, even if it’s not the right size.”
“Jamie.” It had been the last one and was only one size too big. She’d meant to alter it, taking up some of the worst-fitting areas, but she’d been so exhausted from work that all she’d been able to do most evenings was make dinner, clean up, and then collapse into bed. She was hoping next week would be easier.
“Hey, there he is!” cried Jamie, running toward another family that was out trick-or-treating. “Andy! Look what we found!”
Amanda caught up a minute later. “Hi there, Andy. Sarah,” she continued, greeting Andy’s mother. “It’s been a while, hasn’t it?”
“It sure has,” answered the other woman. She reached out to take Amanda’s hands. “Amanda, I heard about what happened, and I’m so sorry about —”
She shook her head. “Thanks, but it’s been almost a month now. We’re doing fine.”
The other woman peered at her as their sons ran off down the street. “All right. Well, I wanted to let you know that we’ve been keeping an eye on your house. You know, since you’re not staying there right now. Not that anyone blames you, and we know your gentleman friend has been —”
“He’s my husband,” corrected Amanda.
“Oh!” said Sarah. “Well, congratulations, I guess. Is this recent?”
“No,” she admitted. “But we…well, we wanted to make sure the boys were adjusting all right, and we also didn’t want to take any attention away from their father getting married again. They had a beautiful wedding, by the way. Were you able to make it?”
“No,” said Sarah. “But we didn’t know Joe very well. I don’t think anyone did. Amanda, if you’re not back at the house, are you really doing all right?”
She felt her spine straighten. “Yes. We just need some time.”
“That’s what I was trying to tell you. You can take all the time you need, and tell your frie — your husband — that we’re all keeping an eye on the house while you’re gone. He’s been coming by in the middle of the day, and it’s been obvious that sometimes he’s in a hurry, so it’s probably over lunch when he’s pressed for time. The whole neighborhood is making sure that nothing’s going on. There’s nothing you two need to worry about, except maybe letting us all meet him one of these days.” Sarah smiled. “He looks like quite the catch.”
Amanda smiled back. “He certainly is.”
“Good. You deserve some happiness, especially after…” Sarah trailed off, glancing down the street. “Andy! Jamie! Donald! Make sure you stay within sight!”
A non-specific acknowledgment floated back toward them.
Amanda had used the reprieve to take a deep breath. “Thank you so much, Sarah. This means a lot to me. To all of us.”
“Like I said, we’re happy to do it. How is Jamie holding up? Andy said something about him getting into it with Tad Carlisle at school. The teacher had to move them to different seats. So it didn’t sound that awful, and of course things are kind of difficult right now, but —”
“Jamie got into trouble at school?”
“Yes, on Tuesday. They didn’t call you?”
They had, she remembered abruptly. There’d been a message waiting for her when she got back from a meeting. But she’d returned the call, hadn’t she? How did she not know about the trouble? “Jamie! Over here, please.”
It took a minute for him to come trotting up. “What is it, Mom?”
“What’s this I’m hearing from Mrs. Kaskill about trouble at school?”
His gaze dropped. “Nothin’. Tad was just bein’ a jerk. He’s been hanging with Bobby Boyd too much.”
“I don’t remember hearing that name before.”
“He’s new. Hey, Mom, a bunch of us are ready to go onto the next street. Everyone on this street is already out of candy. If we stay together, can we go?”
“In a minute. We need to talk about you and school.”
“Mom! It’s Saturday. Come on, can’t it wait? It’s been so long since I’ve had a chance to hang out with anyone here in the neighborhood.”
“No, Jamie. Now. What did you and Tad Carlisle argue about?”
“Just stuff.”
“You need to do better than that.”
His tone became wheedling. “Please, Mom, not right now. I want to finish trick-or-treating with everyone else.”
She suddenly realized she was tired. “No, I think it’s about time to go anyway. And we can talk in the car on the way back to Georgetown.”
“Mom! I promise I’ll tell you if I can finish the trick-or-treating first! And it’s only —” he glanced at his watch. “It’s only seven forty-five. How can you be tired? You’re getting to sleep on a bed over at the apartment. I just have a couch.” The expression on his face had become petulant.
“Jamie, that couch is perfectly comfortable, and I do not like your tone.” Her own had become sharp. “Just for that, we are going to leave. Right now.”
“Amanda,” said Sarah gently. “Jamie can stay with us tonight if you’d like. Andy’s room has bunk beds in it.”
She looked around at the houses, the trick-or-treaters, the entire neighborhood, and as she did so a ringing sound filled her ears. It was as though all the windows had become eyes, peering at her and watching every move she made, judging when her son misbehaved and she couldn’t handle it, taunting her with all the families inside when hers had been all but destroyed…
Her breath was coming in short bursts, and the only thing Amanda could think was that they had to get out of there. Now. And stay out. “No, Sarah. Thanks for offering, but we’re both going to be leaving now.”
“You’ve let me stay over at Andy’s a dozen times.”
“Now, James Richard!” Her voice was so shrill that she barely recognized it, and Jamie paled in response to hearing his full name. Tossing a sullen look back toward the pack of children that had gone to the next streak, he closed his candy bag and started walking toward where she’d parked. His back was stiff, and his steps were short and choppy, just like the way everything around her seemed to have become.
“Amanda?” asked Sarah. “Are you all right?”
“I…” she trailed off, trying to take a full breath. “No, Sarah, but I’ll be fine.” At some point, she hoped, even if it wasn’t now. “Thanks for asking.”
“All right. You just remember to call me if you need anything. Okay?”
“Yeah,” she muttered. “Okay.” Then she sprinted back toward the car.
Author’s Note:
- Waldo from Where’s Waldo was one of the most popular Halloween costumes sold in October 1987.